Worst love lines

[sonicfan93]

let's make up really bad love lines. i'll start.

My love for you is bigger than my bottom. :P

 

[Chaos Zero 64]

Do you have a name, or should I just call you "perfect"?

 

[hotdog003]

Boy, I stink at this type of thing...
All that's going through my head is that summer camp skit where two kids sit at a table and the only lines spoken are 'Oh Martha!' and 'Oh Bob!'

 

[Jake]

"Did it hurt?"
"What did?"
"When Satan tried to cannonball you out of Hell?"

 

[Shuffle]

"You know, I was once part of the letter h"

If you don't get it, watch Whose Line.

 

[hotdog003]

"I've changed my mind."
"Let's hope that it works better then the last one!"

 

[Sik]

It's my turn:

I'll kiss you after eating this chesse.

 

[Shadow Hog]

I don't have a library card
But do you mind if I check you out?
I like your skeletal structure, baby
You're an ectomorph, no doubt
Your face is real symmetrical
And your nostrils are so nice
I wish that I was cross-eyed, girl
So I could see you twice

Girl, you smell like Fritos
That's why I'm giving you this hungry stare
You're so hot, you're gonna melt
The elastic in my underwear
I'll bet you're magically delicious
Like a bowl of Lucky Charms
You'd look like Venus de Milo
If I just cut off your arms
What I'm tryin' to say is...

I wanna be your lover, baby
I need somebody to love
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
Now I need somebody to love

Do you believe in love at first sight
Or should I walk by again?
My love for you's like diarrhea
I just can't hold it in
Stop, drop and roll now
'Cause baby, you're on fire
I'll bet your outfit
Makes a lot of noise in the drier

You're absolutely perfect
Don't speak now, you might spoil it
Your eyes are even bluer
Than the water in my toilet
Say, has anyone ever told you
You've got Yugoslavian hands?
No, of course not, that would be stupid
Just forget I ever brought it up
The point I'm trying to make is...

I wanna be your lover, baby
I need somebody to love
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
Now I need somebody to love

I wanna be your Krakatoa
Let my lava flow all over you
I wanna be your anaconda
And your heat-seeking missile too
I wanna be your beef burrito
Am I making this perfectly clear?
I wanna be your love torpedo
Are you picking up the subtle innuendo here?
Uh huh

I hope I'm not being forward
But do you mind if I chew on your butt?
You can tell me truthfully
Am I a steamin' hunk of love now, or what?
There just aren't enough o's in "smooth"
To describe how smooth I am
Maybe you've seen my picture
It's in the dictionary under "Kablaam!"
My lips are registered weapons
Can I invade your personal space?
You must have fallen from heaven
That would explain how you messed up your face
Well, how'd you get through security?
'Cause baby, you're the bomb
I'd like to take you home right now
So you can meet my mom
Because I...

I wanna be your lover, baby
I need somebody to love
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
Now I need somebody to love

Girl, you must be Jamaican
Because Jamaican me crazy
Girl, you must be Jamaican
Because Jamaican me crazy

I wanna be your lover, baby
I need somebody to love
You know I just wanna be your lover, baby
Now I need somebody to love

In other words, Weird Al Yankovic wins the topic.

 

[Sik]

Oh, well, I think that nobody will be able to post something here, with that letter, Shadow Hog... You win again...

 

[brianv]

"Giggidy Giggidy Giggidy"

 

[Shadow Hog]

It's a song ("Wanna B UR Lover"), and as I said, Weird Al wins, not me.

 

[Shuffle]

"I love to do girls in the can!"
Who else but Quagmire?
"Giggity, giggity, giggity, let's have s**!"

 

[Omega the Hedgehog]

I was watching Nick's 'Big Q' yesterday and somebody said 'Giggity Gigggity Goo' was their favorite quote. Somebody else said 'Up, over and GONE' as well, which really suprised me o_O

 

[Bigboi]

I saw that, too. O_O

"They call me BIGboi for a reason... .

 

[Shuffle]

"They call me SHUFfle for a reason" ;D

 

[Omega the Hedgehog]

They call me--... wait, nevermind. They usually call me Omega.

 

[Bigboi]

Heh.

 

[hotdog003]

People usually call me on the phone.

 

[JetKrazy]

you can call me if you want. Remember to call me Jet when you call me

 

[Shadow Hog]

People usually call me on the phone.

That's funny, I usually call you "hotdog", but if you want to be known as "on the phone", then sure thing...