The Outsider: What brings you to trust your community?

[The Sin Heartless]

One day in a game dev meeting, my student acquaintances brought up how I should find artists and programmers for my game project to succeed. It brought up conflicting views in my head and how I haven't been able to trust any people I have met for a while now. Such pondering has often turned to a feeling of not belonging anywhere. I can't find an answer.

So I ask you, what brings you to trust a community? What brought you together? Has the times together been unforgettable and filled with happiness or has that road become littered with thorns and regret? How do you know when to trust and when to not?

 

[clairebun]

Don't worry about being the sole person with this point of view, as I'm still trying to work that problem out for myself.

Unfortunately I don't think I've ever made myself particularly close to anyone in the community. You can blame that on parenting more than anything else -- my folks back then were suspicious of internet communities to an unhealthy degree. (Ironically, nowadays it seems like they'll believe just about anything they read on the internet...)

 

[Mystic]

You can blame that on parenting more than anything else -- my folks back then were suspicious of internet communities to an unhealthy degree. (Ironically, nowadays it seems like they'll believe just about anything they read on the internet...)

All I can think of is this old tweet:

1998:
- Don't get in strangers' cars
- Don't meet ppl from internet

2016:
- Literally summon strangers from internet to get in their car

 

[Monster Iestyn]

Depends on what level of trust you mean exactly. There's talking casually to people on the internet, there's talking honestly about personal things, and even meeting up with such people in real life. Also depends on which people you mean by the "community", but at this point I'm being pedantic.

Really, I would just say it's probably mostly the same as getting to trust anyone in real life. Say, learn these people exist one day, go over and say hi, talk to them (or at least just listen to what they're talking about to each other, if there's more than one), take your time to learn how the people work and eventually (maybe after months or years) you get used to them enough to reasonably trust them, if there are no problems along the way. If they've done genuinely nice things for you then likely they would deserve more trust etc.

But then of course watch how they treat other people, if not yourself. Particularly watch those people that are just generally awful except maybe to you and a few others. Just because they don't treat you like rubbish right now, doesn't mean they won't in the future.

Otherwise, I would just say use "common sense" if you can.

(I could probably go on a bit more, but for some reason I'm up at 7am yikes; maybe another time)

 

[Nev3r]

So I ask you, what brings you to trust a community?

Nothing. I can only trust people individually.