Just a little joke.

[Shadow Hog]

There once was an old woman with a crapload of money. Her daughter was legally entitled to the majority of it, but being greedy, she couldn't wait long enough for her mother to die, so she decided to hire somebody to make it happen faster.

Enter Artie. Artie accepts to choke the mother for the daughter, and in exchange gets all of one dollar - he's broke, 'kay? Just the one dollar will help.

So, Artie tails the old woman for the majority of the next day. Finally, as she's at the grocery store (say, Safeway), he comes at her and grasps her around the neck, and cuts off her air until she falls down unconscious.

But the bag boy saw this! Can't leave witnesses who are willing to act, so Artie rushes over to him and grasps him by the neck until he faints, too.

However, he's too late, and security are already coming down. Artie, feeling especially brave, does the exact same to the security man - cuts off his air until he faints.

Now, finally, he can get back to killing the old woman... oh, no, wait, the police showed up. Artie rushes over to choke them, too, but instead gets hit in the head with a large blunt object - the police aren't dummies. When he comes to, he's arrested and well off to jail. HAPPY END (well, there's more, but still).

The newspapers were ALL over this one... all over the country, papers blazed with the following headline:

"ARTIE CHOKES THREE FOR A DOLLAR AT SAFEWAY"

 

[hotdog003]

And... what country is this?

 

[Walan]

A priest, a gay man, and Michael Jackson walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "What is this, a joke?"

 

[Bigboi]

How about Yo Mama jokes?

Yo Mama's sooooo poor, I saw her kicking a can down the street. I asked, "What are you doing?" She said, "Moving". :P

More:

Yo mama's so fat, when she stepped on the dog's tail we had to change his name to Beaver.

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Sham.
Sham who?
I didn't know we were talking about yo mama.

Yo mama's so fat, when the cops see her on a street corner they yell, "Hey you guys, break it up!"


Yo mama's so fat she makes Godzilla look like an action figure.

Yo' mama so dumb, she waited at a STOP sign until it said GO!

Yo mama's so big, fat and clumsy, when she tried to get to Wal-Mart, she stumbled over K-Mart and landed right on Target.

Yo mama is so ugly that when she worked at the bakery they dipped her face in the batter to make animal cookies.


Yo' mama so dumb, she failed a pregnancy test!

Yo mama's so dumb, when god was giving out brains she thought they were milkshakes and asked for extra thick.

Yo' mama so dumb, she bought a solar powered flash light!

 

[hotdog003]

I like that last one...

 

[Ritz]

Yo' mama so dumb, she waited at a STOP sign until it said GO!

My mom actually did that once. She was a bit tired at the time, however. Now It's sort of like an in-joke between us. "Hold on... I'm waiting for the stop sign to change."