Couldn't resist laughing when i saw this

[ABraker95]

I doubt any of you would be online for this long, but if you do:



You have been online for TOO LONG when...

You have been online for 45 minutes. Do you want to stay online? Please respond within 10 min. or you will be logged off.

You have been online for 135 minutes. Not to put any pressure on you, but there ARE other people in the world who would like to sign on. Let's show some sorry consideration for our fellow members and sign off, whaddya say?

You DO realize that you've been online for 184 minutes, right? when was the last time you went outside?
OK. This is getting ridiculous. Frankly, you're starting to piss us off! If you sign off now, we'll bring back your Buddy List OK? yep finally

You have been online for 360 minutes now!! We promised you unlimited time, we know, but can't you just finish up NOW and go read a good book?

You have been online for 467 minutes. Do you remember your family members' names ?

You have been online for 513 minutes. Your husband has left you and your dog is starving. Do you wish to remain online?

You have been online 724 minutes. Steve Case is coming personally to your house to yank the phone cord....

You have been online 852 minutes, do you KNOW how many HOURS that is?"

You have been online for 921 minutes. Do you realize that AOL averages 921 complaints per hour about busy phone lines? Do you realize that AOL receives 9.21 lawsuits per day due to busy phone lines? Please sign-off to reduce these averages, or go to keyword: CLASS ACTION to join a lawsuit.

You have been online for 967 minutes. When AOL went unlimited they didn't think you would take it literally. Now get the H*ll off before we go broke!





For those who have their eyes glued to their e-mails 24/7:

You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail on the way back to bed.

You get a tattoo that reads "This body best viewed with Netscape Navigator 1.1 or higher."

You name your children Eudora, Mozillia and Dotcom.

You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your lap...and your child in the overhead compartment.

You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two, just for the free Internet access.

You laugh at people with 9600-baud modems.

You start using smileys in your snail mail.

Your hard drive crashes.

You haven't logged in for two hours.

You start to twitch.

You pick up the phone and manually dial your ISP's access number.

You try to hum to communicate with the modem. ...And you succeed.

You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word processor.com

You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.

You start introducing yourself as "JohnDoe at AOL dot com."

All of your friends have an @ in their names.

Your cat has its own home page.

You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.

You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.

Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.

You don't know what sex three of your closest friends are, because they
have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.

You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.

You tell the cab driver you live at "http://1000.edison.garden/house/brick.html."

You start tilting your head sideways to smile.




Just couldn't resist sharing it!!!

 

[Colson]

With my amazing psychic powers, I can see this thread being locked in the near future.

 

[Blitzzo]

Umm... wow. This must have come from the days of early Web 1.0 when everyone used that horrible AOL service.

There's no point to this topic. Lock. Colson, don't backseat moderate.